January 8, 2011

Zardoz; One of Those Movies You Cannot Simply Ignore

awesome heavy-metal logo!
Once in every while, you'll find a movie that made you question your existence (Where do I fit in all of these? What's the point of your being here? What is the meaning of all life then? ). Then your judgement ( This is crap, but then why am I still amused by this trickery? Is this so bad that it is good or vice versa? A line that borders grotesquery and greatness perhaps?) . And in the end your sanity (I like it actually, am I nuts?)

Of course you're familiar with the arousal inducing image of Leeloo and Leonidas. Well, this movie have Sean Connery as the leading man and as you know his version of Bond, James Bond is unquestionably  HOT.


But this is before all of the above. This is something else. This is Zed.
Warning:  Disturbing Image
The next picture might injure your memory, for it might etched in your brain forever



Yes, your eyes did not fool you it is Sean Connery in a red thongs and fuck-me-boots. This is 2293!


Okay so the film was started by this blue pharaoh-head-wrapper thingie, sharpie-goatee wearing guy that claims he was some sorta god.

annoys the hell out of me this guy is
Then black out.
Then there's this giant stone head saying " Gun is Good, Penis is Evil!" with a James Earl Jones-y kinda voice. And I said to myself oh it's gonna be good, real good. It's gonna be like Monty Python's Holy Grail, you know it will be gold as the instead of-riding-real-horse-have-coconut-clapping-cohort knight approaches


But then..... The head vomits guns! And mud-cakey people wearing red thongs and styro masks starts killing non-mud-cakey-people-wearing-red thongs-and-styro-masks. And up close there's Zapata-mustached Zed, he turns and Bang! He shot somebody in front of him (the camera man?!!)

All red then Black.

Later he found himself inside the mouth of Zardoz. And when meeting this pain-in-the-ass sharpie-goatie guy, and Sean Connery does what Sean Connery good at. Shooting people that pissed him off.  And so Zed killed  his god (the guy was the man behind Zardoz, Zed and the gang's god) by accident. Inside the head there are naked people in cellophane-sack (oh there's gonna be a lot of these going on in the films)


Riding the giant head, he arrived in this place, somekind of paradise where the Eternals live. The Eternals are somewhat superhumans with psychic ability and bad taste. Give up the headdress will you! 

Zed and the Eternals
And they got their kicks from  watching Zed's memories of sex and violence. 


Consuella teaches Penic Erection 101
I think I should just let you see the movie trailer and stills. Because I currently find myself flabbergasted in just trying to re-enact the scenes in my brain. You could try to read the plot here, I read it myself and I find it; Well, I see, Okay. But the movie was just beyond trippy!!! In in a totally twisted way it strangely reminds me of the super awesome works of my  comic artist Moebius

 Hello stoners,  this is yours!!!


the Apathetics turned Bacchanalian after tasting Zed's sweat

Enough with this cellophane sacks!!!


the Tabernacle

war of the badly dressed

The End

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